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Emotional Intelligence

emotions

Ah this is a hard one, but its something i must need to learn. One way or another.

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Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.. Happy Birthday Rev!

Michael Luther King was born on this day in 1929, in Atlanta, Georgia. He received his father’s name “Martin” at the age of six. Dr. King’s LAST SPEECH was his famous “I’ve Been the Mountaintop”. What is not well known, is his LAST SERMON – “The Drum Major Instinct” delivered to his congregation from the pulpit of Ebenezer Baptist Church on February 4, 1968. Of all of his speeches & sermons, “The Drum Major Instinct” is by far my favorite. This sermon defined for me TRUE LEADERSHIP as well as to seek greatness through service and love.

So many think leadership is based on your obtained position…WRONG. TRUE LEADERSHIP, as Doc, teaches from Mark 10:35, is based on SERVICE. He tells, Jesus said to his disciples, he who is GREATEST among you shall be a SERVANT. He who is SERVANT of all, shall be CHIEFEST of All. This has been my guiding principle.

Now he tells us about this INSTINCT within us all, he says, “We all want to be important, to surpass others, to achieve distinction, to lead the parade…this quest for recognition, this desire for attention, this desire for distinction is the basic impulse, the basic drive of human life, this Drum Major Instinct.”

He goes on to say that as babies we cry for attention because of the Instinct. As adults, he said we love the attention from being praised and that only time we don’t like praise is when that PRAISE is going too much towards someone else (Doc, did you just call out HATERS?). He says that every one of us likes to be praised because of this Real Drum Major Instinct.
In effect Dr. King, is saying in some form or fashion we want to be FIRST because of this Instinct that is naturally inside of us. We want to be The Drum Major and lead the Parade. Right now I can hear some of you saying, “that’s not me, I don’t want to be out front”. This may be true BUT, YOU LIKE PRAISE…you lying if you say otherwise.

In the end, The Good Dr. says its okay to want to be FIRST, but be FIRST in LOVE. Be FIRST in GENEROSITY. Be FIRST in SERVICE to humanity (feed the hungry, clothe the naked, visit those in prison, etc). Be FIRST in UNDERSTANDING. Be FIRST in putting YOU LAST. Teach me Doc, teach me!

We are all better having had such a Drum Major. But what of his Marching Band? What manner of people were they? His Marching Band was VISIONARY. His Marching Band was UNSELFISH. His Marching Band was COURAGEOUS. His Marching Band was DETERMINED. My Mama was in his Marching Band, that’s how I know!

My Mama told me WE had to take Literacy Tests and interpret the US Constitution from people no better educated than US! If WE passed, THEN WE could pay $2.00 to vote for a candidate on the ballot, none of which gave a damn about US! Why? Because my Mama and millions like her were UNSELFISH enough to subject themselves to that humiliation for the greater good. Next, they were VISIONARIES, cause even though their day was far from DEMOCRATIC, they KEPT THEIR EYES ON THE PRIZE. That’s why we saw so many folks from our parents’ generation and older were crying at the election of President Obama. He represented the manifestation of their wildest DREAMS. (Quote by Carl)

It’s been a longgg longg time coming.. but a change is gonna come. hbd

So let us take this Day to remember

Remember this phenomenal man,

Let us learn from me

Let us be inspired

Let us go and make change!

Thank God for MLK

Thank God for our leaders

Thank God for life.

Thank you God, for MLK

Happy Birthday Reverend!!

First Writing Since…

I can’t write. Nor can I speak because I’m habouring somewhat a broken heart. I’m not sure what it is, yet. But it sure feels like one. I’m just sitting here. Hugging myself and reassuring myself that I won’t break. That its okay. That maybe we were not ever going to be. He was just a ship that passed in the night. One hell of a merry night. I love him. Its not my bad. Its not his either. But now the question comes, whose is it so I can hand it back to them its too heavy for me. Too taxing. I can’t sit still because i see it everywhere. He is every where in my world. Yet, he isnt HERE… I have spent time loving, unashamedly, bravely and unquestionably. It is a very dangerous feeling to have about someone. Seeing as it has been as one sided as i suspected it could be. That realisation alone, set the sun to some emotions and brought darkness over some. The problem is that, I waited for a while for my time with love to come, his love. Not anyone else’s. For a whole lot of time. Not considering the possibility of that never happening. I refused to go there because I believed I can’t have a chance t something so great and have it be just that, a chance. It all had to return to me, to search for me. We may have not chosen to meet but we should have chosen to seek one another out. So for now I will remeber all those times I wrote and mailed. Called and waited. I may have not been too excited about the idea of putting myself out there and saying ‘I’m still here’ but I’m glad I did.. everyone i looking for something(one) that they can be happy with share life with. Pray with. Laugh with. I will still continue to pray that you find that happiness because the man i saw in you deserves all that and all the good things in the world. You are amazing and incredible, and i don’t say that lightly.

Fools in Love

Fools In Love. Enchanted by a blissful, and sometimes willful ignorance, we become fools in love as we allow ourselves to be fooled by the fools we love. We become blind to that one thing that needs to be seen, deaf to that one thing that needs to heard, and mute about that one thing that needs to be said—the truth. Truth and honesty is what we all desire in relationships. Truth and honesty is what a lot of us promise in relationships. But truth and honesty is what many of us fail to give, or receive—in that failed moment, love becomes nothing more than a tango between the fooled and the foolish.

A lot of us avoid telling or hearing the truth in our relationships because on a very basic level—regardless of good intentions or bad—we don’t want the people we are in love with to see us for who we really are, nor do we want to see them for who they really are. Afraid that the person we are with would rather leave us than better themselves for the good of the relationship, some of us are willing to lie about our feelings and pretend we are happy. To avoid being seen for the deceitful and unfaithful creatures we are, some of us dodge sharing the truth because we fear the consequences of it and what that will reveal about our character. Some of us, just to shield ourselves from someone else’s anger or tendency to overreact, will bend the truth or alter it completely because we don’t want to see them for the jealous and controlling person they really are. Some of us, in order to seem deserving of our love interest’s affection and attention, will embellish, exaggerate, and fabricate our goals and aspirations, achievements and accomplishments. And some of us, in order to maintain our false reality and keep it intact, will embrace denial and avoid hearing the truth about our relationship from those honest people who see it for what it is. Regardless of our reasons—good or bad, selfish or selfless—we convince ourselves that a lie is better than a truth, and that moment makes you, me, us, fools in love.

I miss him

Today is one of those day, when I really miss my i-don’t-know-what-to-call-him friend who’s also more than a friend.. smh, to make matters worse, this whole thing is long distant.. ugh

Have u ever liked someone so much that it annoys you?  Anyways, i really miss him tonight, and wish he was here.. but then again, i wish we cld jst figure this whole thing out… *sigh* so imma be here and keep replaying sad-ish songs